Unholy Union
by PurleLullaby
Summary: Eric returns early from Africa to get Donna back . But when he meets new bitchy Donna, hartless vile Hyde and broken Jackie, he forms an union with his enemy to mess with their former lovers trough fake love charade . Will their 'newly discovered love' hit their tagets?
1. Revenge

**A/N-** Hi guys. This is another idea that was roaming trough my head, and since the first one was accepted much better than I expected, I decided to share another one of my ideas with you. And no, I DIDN'T abandon _'In pursuit of love', _but I had so much work lately that I didn't have time to eat, let alone write. And today I finally decided to write another chapter but this story just stuck in my mind and I couldn't concentrate on anything beside this. I hope you'll like it.

**A/N 2- **The story takes place in season 8, in episode where Kelso proposes to Jackie, but I moved timeline a little. Hyde is married and Kelso is still leaving, but Eric already broke up with Donna and she is with Randy now. Of course, scrawny guy realizes that he can't live without her and returns to Point Place, only to meet new bitchy Donna, heartless vile Hyde and broken Jackie set on revenge. Two enemies decide to mess with their former lovers trough fake love charade – with each other. Will their "newly discovered love" affect their targets?

**A/N 3- **I'm a J/H shipper. But should Hyde suffer for what he did? Oh yes!

**I don't own 'That 70's show'. Some of the lines are from episode 'Misfire', s08e04.**

* * *

**Unholy union**

**Chaprter 1 - ****Revenge**

„...thank you for celebrating our 25th anniversary with us. You know, nothing makes me appreciate..." Red Forman unwillingly grumbled to the room full of guests, not even trying to hide his annoyance. Hyde was sure it would pay off to listen his speech, not out of courtesy, but for guaranteed burn which will surely be included. You've got to admire a man who is sarcastic and biting as he is. Of course, after 25 years of marriage, who can blame him?

While pretending to listen, his sunglasses covered stare jumped from Kelso to Jackie and back again. Will he do it? Is he really so stupid to propose Jackie Burkhart? Sure thing. She makes you stupid. And then he looked at the blue balloon which should replace two-carat diamond engagement ring and had to laugh. Even Jackie isn't so desperate to get married to tie a balloon to her finger... but then again... Maybe Kelso will take her to Chicago so he won't have to look at her every day.

.

While his gaze travelled from one of his targets to another he couldn't help but notice Donna and Randy. It seems she quickly found a replacement for Forman. And as his wife puttered around the waistband on the back of his pants, for a second his mind drifted to his friend in Africa. And only one thought went through his head, a fact which he learned as a child, a fact which was proven as correct time and time again, and now even Donna confirmed it: Who isn't here, without him it can be.

.

„Mr. and Mrs. Forman, your long and happy marriage got me thinking about my future." Kelso started while hugging Mr. and Mrs. Forman, his eyes set on his soon to be wife „And...when I think about my future there is always someone special in it. I mean besides me. So..." With his last word he looked at his oldest present friend, gratitude shining from his eyes. After all, if Hyde didn't talk to him he would bail again and forever ruin his chances with Jackie. And recipient of that gratitude could think only one: _'Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.' _"...in front of all the people that I love..." Kelso came closer to the girl he loved since he was six and dropped on one knee. _'Get up man! Get up!' _Hyde's mind screamed. "...Jacqueline Burkhardt, will you marry me?" Kelso pronounced, his wide open eyes set on beautiful girl in front of him, balloon as promise of eternal love and fidelity was the only thing separating them.

"Oh Michael..." her voice trembled from excitement_. 'Why can't earth just open and swallow her when you need it?!'_ Zen-guy wondered. "No."

"Congratu...What the hell?" Was Fez's reaction.

"No?"

"No."

"Jackie, you have just made me the happiest man in the world!" Kelso exclaimed, his voice a mixture of relief and excitement.

"Really?" Jackie smiled

"Yeaaahhh! I mean, I love you and all, but, it's like... this is like the worst idea I've ever had! And I have had some bad ideas! I mean a fire-cracker suit?! Like what the hell was that?"

"Michael, if you and I got married it would be a disaster. I mean I love you, but you have so much growing up to do." Ex-cheerleader smiled and fell into the arms of her first boyfriend. He lifted her up and spun around. One day, when he grows up, and when he could offer her everything she deserves, he will kneel down in front of her again. They both knew it.

"Why are you so happy?" Sam asked her husband, unprepared for the biggest grin she ever saw on his face.

Hyde quickly collected oneself, pissed that his Zen just flew away. "Why wouldn't I be? Kelso is an idiot, but even he didn't deserve total destruction of his life." He put his arm around his wife's shoulder and took a big gulp of his beer.

.

"Congratulations guys! For a second I was afraid that Kelso will forever be contaminated by the forces of darkness." Came from kitchen door and everyone held their breath and turned in that direction.

"My baby!" Kitty was first person who spoke, or screamed, and run to hug her child.

Red's growl was the second: "What the hell are you doing here?"

"This is the best day ever!" Kelso yelled through laughter which rapidly infected every other resident of the room. Soon they all hurried to scrawny man, and the last thing Eric saw before his gaze was disturbed by the herd of people was his ex-girlfriend, love of his life, the reason of his return to this God forsaken place, in arms of someone else. Exactly that picture stopped him from jumping on Kelso while he was kneeling in front of the Devil. This wasn't the plan.

.

"Oh honey, you are so skinny. Didn't they feed you there?"

"Forman man, did you bring me a gift? I'm aiming for a new plant for my room."

"What the hell are you doing here? Did they kick you out from Africa?"

"Couldn't go on without your dolls, ha? Or your mummy?"

"I will take my pictures of barebreasted native women now. Or candy."

"Hey, did you bring one of those women with you?"

"Oh gee... this is so emotional day."

"Okay... one by one!" Eric told somewhat louder to out voice his friends and family. Smile was attached to his face, gladness that he was obviously missed only obscured with new knowledge's and the fact that the most important person didn't speak at all. In fact, total 3 persons didn't speak: blond in short mini skirt and tight tube top – he assumed Hyde's stripper wife, creepy guy with strange hair and Donna. She quickly and slightly clumsy step out from other's man embrace and stared at him with dumbfounded face expression. Finally, she roused from trance and joined her friends to hug him. Physical contact which he eagerly awaited but was broken way too soon for his liking. Not a good sign.

.

Jackie sat alone in dark basement, staring at turned off TV. Upstairs atmosphere was too cheerful for her current state of mind and for once she was grateful on skinny Star Wars freak. His presence preoccupied the rest so she was able to sneak away unnoticed. But naturally, her peace was soon broken, loud steps on stairs announced that she is no longer alone, and she knew who it was without turning around. She should have known he will unload that slut from his lap long enough to came and annoy her. Maybe if she sits perfectly still he won't notice her.

"What are you doing here?" Came from behind, strong voice with undertone of anger.

"Just wanted to rest a while. It's loud upstairs." She answered, still staring in front of herself.

"You're moping." It was more a statement then a question. _'Of course she is moping. What exactly did you expect? The chance to become Mrs. Kelso slipped through her fingers.'_

"Why would I mope? And what are you doing here anyway?" Forefeeling an argument her voice raised.

"Well, you just missed the only chance to get married. Like ever." Hyde answered coldly, his tone affecting her much more than she would like or ever admit. He made his way to shower curtain and picked up a pack of beers, and the closer he get, the more grateful she was on darkness. Unpleasant feeling that this conversation will end in tears hung in the air.

"What are you talking about? I was the one who said 'no'."

"And he was devastated because of that." He smirked sarcastically. "Shame really. We did everything apart from tie him to stay and propose to you. And then you say no. All that effort for nothing."

"What?"

"Why so surprised? You didn't really think someone would propose to you voluntarily?" He said peacefully, like he is reading daily horoscope and not breaking her heart. Jackie stared at him, trying to read him to see is he telling the truth. But just like in every other argument since Sam came, her eyes were already full of tears and obscuring her vision. She knew it's only a matter of seconds before her voice starts to tremble, and she'd be dammed if she'll let him see her cry.

"I still have options. If everything else fails I can always take off my clothes and wait for some drunken burnout to pick me up. I hear it works."

"I suggest you to do that as soon as possible. Let's face it; you're not getting any younger and what else you have to attract men? Money is gone, daddy is in prison, and your personality... well let's just say no one will fall for snobby spoiled rich mouth attitude. And is there something you know to do except for shopping? No? So stripping it is." He finished and stared at her. Seeing that her spirit is still not completely broken and that another comeback is slipping through her mouth he decided to put the last nail in her coffin. "Be a good girl and I'll ask Sam to give you some lesions."

"Go to hell Hyde!" She screamed and ran out from basement. As soon as the door closed shut bitter tears washed her face.

.

At the same time, on the other side of the house Donna made her way to the kitchen. And of course, Eric followed right behind.

"Hey." He announced his presence quietly, keeping a few meters between them, wanting to give her space.

"Hey." Donna responded staring at the floor.

"So... how'd you been?"

"Fine." Was her only response.

Unpleasant silence spread through the kitchen.

"I'm sorry Africa didn't turn out good for you." Former redhead started talking again. She is strong independent woman who can kick his ass in less than 12 seconds. There is no reason to be afraid of him.

"Yeah... so... you and Rodney?" _'Oh that was smooth.'_ Eric thought

"Randy."

"Randy. Sorry."

"Yes, me and Randy." Suddenly it was practically impossible to look him in the eyes.

"Is it..." It was almost physically painful to finish the sentence. Not for the sentence itself, but for the answer he somehow knew is coming. "Is it serious?"

"You can say that."

His heart sank. And he knew he had no right on that. In his letter he clearly stated she should continue with her life, find someone who makes her happy and live. Is she happy? It's been only a bit more than month since the letter. How serious can it be? Should he tell her she is the reason he is here? Has he right? Yes. He crossed half of the Earth to stand before her and claim her back. There is no withdrawing now.

"Look Donna... I know I have absolutely no right to ask anything from you. But I... I just want to tell you why I'm here. The only reason I'm in this hellhole again is yo-..."

"I don't care." Donna stated surely. "I don't want to know why you're here and when or if you're going back." All insecurities from before disappeared.

"But Donna..." Now Eric was desperate.

"No. You decided our relationship is over. Now I'm deciding I don't want to hear about this. I moved on. You should too."

"Don't say that." His tone was pathetic and pleading. His eyes were begging, not for another chance... just for her to listen. But Donna was done with crying and thinking. She started to chuckle.

"And what did you expect? That I will fall into your arms and kiss you senselessly as soon as I see you? Nothing is the same anymore. And if you came for me... then I suggest you to go back to Africa. I finally found someone mature and responsible. And I won't screw it up because of you." Her tone was harsher then she intended it to be, but bitterness inside of her which was collecting since the day of his departure came out. Without anther glance at him she went back to living room.

A few moments passed before Eric found the strength to move again. The thought to confront with others seemed unbearable at the moment so he went in opposite direction, to the glass sliding doors and out to the porch.

.

As soon as he stepped outside he noticed a small seating figure in one of the chairs. _'Great. It's just what I need.' _"Don't you have some other house to haunt?" Silence was her only response, and since this is Jackie it was more than weird. "Jackie?" He tried again. And again with the silence. He wasn't sure what made him to take a few steps closer and rotate to see her face. Usually, the silent treatment from Jackie would be desired, even thought he was sure it is only a myth. The closer he got, her trembling became more evident. And when he finally saw her face he understood why she was silent. Her cheeks were washed with tears, eyes red and puffy and her mouth were uncontrollable trembling.

"What happened?" His voice was pure concern and tenderness. And if it was possible it only made her cry harder.

"Go away." The girl managed to grumble.

Eric ignored her words and came even closer, put his reassuring hand on her shoulder and look her into eyes. "Why are you crying?"

"I'm not." Jackie said and rapidly started to rub her face with her small hands, desperately trying to banish fallen tears. But the faster her hands wiped, the faster new tears fell.

Not knowing what to do or what happened he said: "I'm going to get Donna. Don't go anyway."

"No!" she shouted and rapidly grabbed his hand to stop him from leaving. "I'm OK."

"What happened?"

"Why do you care? Don't you have enough problems?"

"Oh... so you heard."

"Yes." Petite girl confirmed and started to laugh. Softly at first, but soon it became pretty hysterical. "It was embarrassing. For you." Her tears finally stopped, but her cheeks, swollen from crying, were still damp. "But bravo for Donna."

"I'm glad my misery amuses you." And he truly was. A few more tears and he would have gone mental.

"It serves you right, you know?"

"I know." He sighed. "But that doesn't make it easier."

Noticing true sadness on his young visage she uttered: "At least you came back. And you're trying."

"Are you comforting me? If you are it's weird and scary. Stop it."

"You're right."

"So will you amuse me and tell me what made you cry?"

"No. It's too weird." She said with confused frown.

"What?"

"It's weird that I cry for that! I am Jacqueline Burkhardt. I don't sit in dark and brood over scruffy burnouts!"

"Oh. What did Hyde do?"

Not acknowledging his question Jackie continued. "I don't mope. I revenge! That's what Burkhardt's do. And if anyone can destroy Steven that's me! I can destroy any man! It's in my blood! I'm the queen of manipulation! If I wanted I could make Donna crawl back to you! He's messing with the wrong girl."

In one swift move she lifter herself from the chair, dried her face, straighten her dress and lifted her head. "He won't know what hit him." She murmured to herself. "Let's go numsack. " She said, grabbed his sleeve and dragged him inside.

After couple of steps Eric sopped and asked:"Is she happy?"

Jackie turned to face him and shrugged. "I don't know." She took a deep breath and continued "You should ask her friend."

"That's what I'm doing."

"No, you're not. Her friend is inside. You may know her, she answers to the name 'skanky ho'_._

„The stripper? You're kidding, right?" He started to laugh. When Jackie didn't respond he tried again. „Please tell me you're kidding."

Darkhaired girl went inside without a word, and geek followed.

„The one who asked me did I see Koala bears in Africa?"

„Yep."

Eric followed inside still not believing what he just heard. _'Yea right, next thing she will tell me is that Fez became a ladies man.'_


	2. Revelation

**Unholy Union**

**Chapter 2 – R****evelation**

Next morning Eric refused to get out of bed. He had a mother of hangovers, jet lag was a drag and situation at home was a mess. It's hard to believe that in just few short months everything can change so drastically.

When he was leaving he said goodbye to his best friend who was in a hurry to buy a ring and propose a girl who discovered his heart; to kind hearted doofus; to his girl who promised to wait for him; to stalwart's devil and to dark skinned pervert. And who greeted him? A married Hyde with wrong girl in his lap, Kelso who left town just a few hours after his arrival, Donna in arms of someone who is not him and defeated Jackie. Even Fez seemed kinkier than before – and that was something he never even knew is possible.

The irony of this whole situation didn't escape him. For months he just wanted to go home, and now, when he is finally here he feels like a stranger in his own house, within his family. It's like everyone moved on, escaped from lives they lived before, and he is stuck in the past desperately holding on memories that are long gone.

If he didn't know better he could have sworn that when he get out from the plane he stepped into some kind of paralele-Point-Place-universe. He tried to use the force. It didn't help. All Jedi mind tricks couldn't pry Donna away from that freak, or move her fingers out from his hair. And the funny thing? His mother sent him an audio cassette every week. Every week he listened about his grouchy father, vegetable selection at local Piggly Wiggly and fashion escapades of Hyde's stripper. And had he heard about Donna and her new weirdo boyfriend? Not a word.

Then again, he often listened about his best friend and his wife. And as hard he had laughed when he heard what that idiot did, that can't even compare with sick feeling he got when he saw them together. Tons of cassettes couldn't prepare him for that image. Maybe it was because he was so accustomed on him and Jackie together, it could be that devils tears touched him more than he is aware of, and perhaps it had something to do with the fact that Hyde didn't look happy, or less pissed off – as he would say. He looked tense, edgy, always on lookout for any possibility to burn his ex-girlfriend. Actually, that was one of two things he did when Jackie was concerned. He either burned her or ignored her. It was even worse than her first year in basement. At that time she at least had Donna to occasionally step into her defense. Now she celebrated that burns with Hyde and Samantha. That's right. It seems that she has some sort of connection with her. And that's just sick.

But it was more than Donna and Hyde that left him unsettled. It was the whole gang. Before, when he would look at his group of friends, it always amazed him how 6 totally different people, 6 completely different characters succeeded to find their own language and get along. Now it seems that this group of misfits doesn't fit together at all. In small group smaller groups are beginning to form. Hyde, Donna and their other halves on one side, Fez and Jackie on the other, while Kelso migrates from one to another desperately trying to please his ex-girlfriend and at the same time catch a glimpse of Samantha's panties – not that he has to try very much, since she walks around half naked anyway.

And the whole Jackie and Fez closeness is weird. Just a few months ago Jackie was running from him and his perverse jokes and wooing. Now it almost seems that she enjoys in his attention. Luckily, before his mind started to wonder in that direction, Kitty entered his room and with her distinctive laughter chase away any sickening pictures of two of them.

„Good morning my little snicklefritz! Mummy brings breakfast for her little traveller." She said excitedly and moved closer to him with tray full of food.

"Morning mum." Eric mumbled uninterested, not lifting his head from pillow.

"Well someone is Mr. Cranky this morning... but I brought you super special breakfast. Double chocolate chips pancakes with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles, cold OJ, and an extra treat – new Spiderman comic."

Totally ignoring that oh so alluring tray he skipped to the important subject. "Why didn't you tell me about Donna and Randy?"

"Oh..." Kitty almost whispered, all excitement draining from her face "...hahaha..." and of course resorted to her nervous laughter "...funny story..."

"Mum." He seriously interrupted her.

After taking a deep breath she finally tried to explain. "I didn't know how. I mean... how do you tell your only baby boy that you caught that harlot of his girlfriend kissing another boy in his bedroom while y-..."

"IN MY BEDROOM?" Eric screamed, sharply rising from his bed.

"Well... I could have skipped that little detail... hahaha..." and made a face like she just sucked on sourest lemon.

"In front of my G.I. Joe's?" his voice a terrified whisper.

"I'm sorry honey."

"Well that's just great. I abandon my chance to go to college, run to this town from which I tried to escape my whole life solely and exclusively for her..." and then acted coughing draw his attention to wide eyed Kitty. "...and to see you of course... to find out that not only that she didn't miss me at all, but she was spending her spare time defiling my room! My life is awesome!"

„You know..." Kitty started, put the tray on the table and sat on the edge of his bed „...sometimes, when two people separate, one starts to think about the future. The future without that special someone. And when they see how that future is empty, and lonely, they start to look for someone who would fill that void, in a way replace the one they did, or could lost. And that's what Donna did. But that does not mean she does not have feelings for you."

"Wow mom... sounds like you're talking from personal experience."

"Your father was in Korea! It was war! I had to ensure my future!"

"Ok, Ok. I'm just saying... So you think Donna will take me back?"

"Of course she will." His mother looked at her clasped hands and couldn't not give him one more motherly advice. "Just be careful. Sometimes people you came back to aren't the same ones you left behind."

"Thanks mom. And I think I'm ready for my special breakfast now."

.

After the talk with his mother and delicious breakfast Eric decided to take control over his life. When he finally managed to suppress his violated action figures from his mind he made a plan. And it was simple, two step plan. He will find a job to earn for scholarship and win Donna back. Because frankly, without her everything is in vain. She is the reason of his return, and for her he will stay. After all, they were together for years, in love since childhood, always sharing good and bad in life. It's statistically impossible for someone new to fly in and in one month take his place completely. So, with newfound resolve, he bravely descended to basement where his eyes captured unpleasant scene.

In his usual chair sat Hyde, his eyes glued to the TV, totally oblivious to his wife who was swaying her hips next to the shower and preparing new routine for her show.

Across from him, Fez was crying his eyes out for his runaway friend, while shoving incredible amounts of chocolate down his throat, not caring that half of it actually missed his mouth and covered lower half of his face with brown smudges. That stains, together with his tears created dark liquid that streamed down his shirt and floor. It seems that Kelso is really gone.

But, worst of all, on couch was Donna, leaned on her boyfriend who was, oh so conveniently, sitting on _his_ spot. Trying to cover the stab of jealousy, he completely entered the basement and cheerfully greeted. "Good morning everyone!" Their only response was indistinct mumble, but that didn't discourage him. Instead, he stood between Hyde and couch and started the session of staring in Randy, waiting for this one to notice him. When that didn't happen, le loudly coughed and said: "Excuse me." And finally got his attention. "I know that you are new around here, but we have some rules which you obviously don't know. For example, that..." and pointed to him "...is my seat."

Expecting that Randy will move, he wasn't prepared for Donna's response: "Don't be an idiot Eric."

"Me?" Eric asked offended "I'm an idiot and he is the one who don't know how to sit right?!"

"Well, you don't know how to look right and no one is an ass about that." And Eric was speechless, so confused that he barely acknowledged Hyde's "Nice one." At that moment all he could do was stare back at his ex-girlfriend, but while his eyes revealed bewilderment, from hers was pouring rage and spite.

Finally, Randy interrupted staring contest. "Sorry man, I didn't know it's such a big deal. No one told me it's yours."

„No one told you?" Eric smirked, his tone clearly revealing that he doesn't believe him and turned to his best friend. But when Hyde just ignored him, still staring at TV, Eric's voice took whiny tone and he repeated: "No one told you?"

"Don't be such a girl Forman. It's not a big deal."

"It's not a big deal? Then why isn't he in your chair?"

Hyde finally detached his view from the screen, but before he was able to speak, Donna coldly replied: "Oh grow up and get a life. No one cares."

"What she said." Curly rebel uttered in his usual Zen fashion.

As if that wasn't enough, Samantha decided to salt his already stabbing wound: "A lot has changed since you left. Like, now, Randy has your place and your girlfriend. And I have Jackie's place and Jackie's boyfriend. It's for the best." And she decorated that statement with her usual empty-headed smile.

After that Eric waited. Waited for bitchy, snotty, pitch voiced comment from lowlands which will take away the gift of speech from that smiling moron. But that response never came, and for the first time today he realized how incredible quiet it is down here. And only one question occupied his mind. "Where is Jackie?"

"Don't know, don't care." Came from the married man.

"God, don't summon it." If scrawny man didn't see her lips moving, he would never believe that comment came from his lovely neighbor.

And then the sounds of crying and moaning from their foreign friend which were their faithful companion this whole morning got a hysterical note. His mouth still full of sweets - of which good portion fell out when he started talking, he began to mutter. "M-my goddess... pri-pr-princess of my he-aart... she bar-barely commes here anymore. First she, and now K-kelsoooo! There is no more beauty in this basement! Oyyyy!" Fez turned his head up, his big wet eyes focused to the sky (or basement ceiling more precisely), he turned his chocolate soiled palms in the same direction and painfully cried: "Oh why, God whyyy!?"

"But Fezzy I'm still here." Offered Samantha, seductively blinking with her big eyes in his direction.

"You don't count!" Fez exclaimed sorely. "You're a whore! And not a good whore like Kelso!" Next he abruptly jumped from his chair and headed towards the door. "Good day!"

"But Fez..."

"I said good day!" and slammed the door shut behind him.

"Hyde, he just called me a whore!"

"And what do you want me to do about it? He's gone!"

"And I'm sure you're already accustomed to it." Whispered Eric, so no one would hear him.

"Ass." Grumbled Donna in Hyde's direction.

"Wow. That was fun. But I better head to the store, Leo is alone there." Came from Randy while he was slowly rising to his feet. "You can sit now." He said to Eric.

"Oh, I will!"

"Ready to go Sam?" Donna asked her new friend.

"Go? Go where? You're going?" Eric inquired desperately. He was hoping to finally be alone with her, without the annoying presence of her boyfriend.

"Yes...we are going to the mall to buy something special for Donna." Countered Samantha while obviously blinking at Randy. Of course, Hyde immediately noticed that not so subtle signal and high fived Randy while approvingly nodding: "Someone's gonna get lucky." With Donna's eye roll three of them exited the basement.

.

It was the first time in months that tall nerd and strong Zen-master were completely alone. Obviously, there was a lot to talk about, from Eric's African adventures to Hyde's new lifestyle. So, naturally, Eric decided to begin with the most important: „What the hell Hyde?"

„What?"

„'Someone's gonna get lucky.' Are you crazy?"

„Ok. Randy is gonna get laid. What do you want me to say?"

„How... how can you even talk like that? First that with the sitting place, now..."

„Sitting place?" Hyde was becoming more and more nervous with each next word. „You attacked hm without any reason. What was I supposed to do? Kill him and hide in freezer so you would have your spot back?"

"This isn't about my spot!" Eric spat.

"Oh, I see, this is about Donna, isn't it?" Hyde guessed bitterly.

"Gee, you think?!" Sarcasm was dripping from every word. Frankly, it was about a place to sit, about Donna, about him and their friendship, about the gang, about his place in this damn basement. But, as always, he focused on Donna first.

"Honestly, I don't understand you man. You broke up with her. Why do you care?"

"I care because I love her, because I am here to win her back. And I know I blew it with that letter and that I don't deserve another chance. But I want it. And I knew it won't be easy, but I was sure that you, of all people, will be there for me, help _me_, be on _my_ side, be _my_ friend, and not cheer that blockhead on to sleep with her!" Eric emptied his heart in one breath, hoping that his friend will magically fix everything.

"Man, just let it go."

"I don't want to." He replied, agonized that Hyde can't, or don't want to understand.

"You want my help? Fine. Move on."

Eric chuckled. "Move on like you?"

"Yeah, whatever."

"I would rather melt all mine action figures and donate my whole Star Wars collection to charity." Eric said indignantly.

This got Hyde's attention, so he sat up straight, took off his sunglasses and glared at his companion. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, let me think." For a second he actually pretended like he was thinking about it. "Oh, I know! You got drunk, marry the first Las Vegas bimbo who fell under you, and now you live in basement with stupider version of Laurie. Who wouldn't want to be like you?" Disgust was obvious in his voice.

If this was said two months ago it would probably get trough him, and even if he wouldn't admit it, he would think about it. But currently, his barricades were so thick and cold that this didn't even graze him. So, when he replied, Eric believed what he said. "Whatever. I don't care what you think."

"You used to." After that he left from _his_ seat and exited the basement.

* * *

Thirty minutes later Eric was in a place where he was never alone, until now, and he had absolutely no idea how he ended up here. When he finally knocked on big white door he was more thinking about dark forces that led him here then about his actions. So her confused voice startled him. "Eric? What are you doing here?"

"I need your help."

.

Inside, in big living room, unusual performance took place. Eric was sitting in big leather armchair, his body rigid, while looking towards small dark girl who was mercilessly walking around him, amused smirk plastered on her face.

"So, let me get this straight. You want me..." Jackie pointed a thumb to her chest "...to help you?" and aimed at him.

"Yes."

"To get Donna back."

"Yes."

"And why, for the love of God, would you ask for my help?"

"Yesterday you said you can do it. Make her crawl back to me."

"I can."

"So I'm here."

"But why me?" Although she already guessed that he met new and improved Hyde who obviously refused to help him.

"Well, I was planning to find my way, but she seems different. She acts..."

"Like a bitch." Jackie easy completed his sentence.

"Strange. I was meaning to say strange."

"Oh, she is acting like a bitch. I know, I'm acting like one my whole life."

"Anyway, will you help me or not?"

"No." She replied easily.

"Why? You are too busy plotting your revenge on Hyde."

"As a matter of fact, yes I am." Jackie was sincere.

"And Satan's minion can't multitask, right?"

While her brain was processing his words for a good reply, her cerebral convolutions started to twist, and suddenly she come up with a perfect plan for which she was on the lookout since yesterday. Ideal way to accomplish exactly what she wanted. So, when she spoke, she totally surprised Eric who was ready to leave. "I will help you."

"You will?" He asked with a mixture of hope and disbelief.

"Yes. But I want something in return."

"My soul?"

"No."

"My firstborn?"

"Your help."

"Crap." He somehow knew that this can't be good.

"Think about it. I help you, you help me. I scratch your back, you scratch mine. You will get Donna back so you won't die alone, and I will turn Hyde's life into living hell."

"And what exactly am I supposed to do?"

"You, my freakishly skinny associate, will become my boyfriend."

As soon as those words left her lips Eric started to laugh. He laughed so hard that he almost rolled over his chair; his stomach started to hurt and in his head began buzzing. Finally, after good minute of pure amusement he wiped a single tear from his eye and recollected himself enough to speak. "Oh, I didn't laugh this hard since... No I never laughed this hard. Now seriously, what's your plan?" When she just continued to stare at him, her hands casually crossed behind her back Eric's sight darkened. "Oh my God, you are serious!" He cried and started to yell. "Are you crazy?! I already live in hell; I don't need to link myself to the devil to complete the puzzle! And how the hell would that help me?!"

"Oh please. Look at me! I'm freaking gorgeous. Value of any guy who starts to date me exponentially grows with every hour spent in my presence. Even yours. Why do you think Michael cheated on me so much?"

"Aaaa... because he is a man-whore?"

"Ok, yes. But the fact that every girl who knows me was throwing herself at him didn't help. Besides, everyone knows that every woman wants what she knows she can't have. It's in our nature."

"It is?" Eric asked genuinely astonished.

"Yes. And how you are still not a virgin will never stop to amaze me."

"All right. Let's just for a second say that I am considering it, which I'm not. How would that help you? You want to make Hyde jealous?"

"Oh please, if I wanted to make him jealous I would find someone way better than you." And she secretly knew that to make someone jealous, that someone must feel something for you. Which Hyde doesn't. After that thought she met Eric's offended glare and ignored it. "I want to make him suffer. And that will happen because of you." When she realized that he would understand her better if she was talking in Hebrew, she started to explain further. "You see, when Michael found out about me and Hyde, sure, he was crushed for loosing me, I mean, who wouldn't be? But there was one question which he asked me time and time again: 'Why him?' It has something to do with code of some kind..."

"Bro code." Eric informed her. "Rules no.1: 'Thou shalt not sleep with your Bro's ex-girlfriend.' and no.4: 'If a girl was an ex-girlfriend she is off limits forever until the end of time.' could be applied in that situation."

Jackie eyed him disgusted. "You are such a freak." And waited for Eric to realize where her story was heading. Finally, after several intensively long seconds it finally came to his brain.

"Oohhh... I get it." He said deeply impressed. "You really are evil."

Jackie shrugged and Eric started to think. Donna is the love of his life and he knows that he will never be completely happy without her by his side. And as incredible as it sounds, he can make her happy too. He knew without a doubt that he came to the right person, and if anyone can help him it is Jackie. He also knew that Hyde hurt her immensely, and that he deserves to be punished, probably even over him.

"Jackie... Hyde is more than a friend to me. He is like my brother."

"I know. And that's why it's perfect. If I did it with Fez, it would probably sting a little. With Michael would probably hurt a bit more, but it would be something that he expected for years. But with you... the guy who is like a brother, who took him into his house and family... for goodness sake, that must induce some feelings in him!"

"God, you really want to hurt him, don't you? But if you loved him, shouldn't you, I don't know, wish him to be happy?"

"Hello! Did you forget who are you talking to?" Jackie asked him with raised voice. "And don't you know what that jerk did to me?"

Eric knew. And the sick thing? He actually understood her.

"I can't Jackie." He said quietly, his tone almost apologetically. "I just can't do this to him. If you asked me for anything else... I just can't."

And Jackie understood. And was actually a little jealous on their friendship and loyalty they shared. It was something she never actually had. So she nodded, offered him a week but genuine smile and escorted him from her mother's house.

* * *

The rest of the day Eric spent trying to fulfill the first step of his plan: get a job. Which didn't go so well. When he checked all job openings and file a few applications, he realized that it's too early to go home. More precisely, he didn't want to confront with its residents. He was in no hurry to listen to his father's nagging to go back to Africa and finish what he started, endure his mother's smothering or Hyde's, even for him, cold behavior. So he spent the next few hours on water tower thinking about past times when everything seemed easier and undoubtedly better. When he finally peered to the basement, it was already dark outside. On his usual place was Hyde, while Donna, Samantha and Randy occupied the couch. Too depressed to fight over his spot again he sat on the other chair and successfully ignored just a few spoken words in so unusually noiselessly space. Then the door flew open and revealed panting Jackie with Fez leaned over her shoulder.

"Fez, I swear to God, if you drool over my dress, I will put you into that hospital again! And stop trying to grab my boob!" With that she pushed week and pale Fez to the couch, on the place which until few seconds ago occupied Samantha, but literally ran to Hyde's lap as soon as she noticed Jackie.

"What is going on?" Asked Eric when he took in the unusual scene.

"I will tell you what is going on! That idiot ended up in hospital! They had to pump out his stomach because all the sweats he ate! He collapsed in candy shop!"

"I was grieving for Kelso. I just want to suppress this pain! Ohhh..!"

"Fez..." Donna interrupted his squeaking. "...do we need to have _the talk_ again?"

"No." Foreigner mumbled quietly.

"Are you sure?" Inquired Hyde.

"Yes. I know all about the food pyramid." Fez whispered ashamed.

"But why were you with him?" Arrogantly asked the blond from her husband's lap.

"I wasn't with him! He apparently has me as an emergency contact number!" Jackie quieted and then sniffed the air around her. "And now I smell like hospital! And sick people!"

"But Fezzy... why didn't you call one of us. I would help you." Softly said the stripper.

"I was hoping to get some nookie from my queen when she sees how week and helpless I am."

"Kelso would be proud." Randy praised.

"I know." Fez whispered longingly and wiped fresh tears from his face.

"I totally understand why he called her." Hyde commented. "She has no friends, no boyfriend, no life, no job. What better would she have to do than to pick him up? She is the safest bet." His words were soaked with bile and successfully laughed two blonds.

"You know I would stay here and argue with you, but I have better things to do with my evening." Jackie said and headed towards the exit.

"Night shift again?" Hyde smirked. "Good luck!"

Eric looked at Jackie's back and noticed how she stiffened for a moment and then left without a word. "You call her a whore?" He then asked his best friend, with his tone clearly implying what he meant.

"Watch your mouth Forman."

"I'm going to bed." Eric stated and started to climb the stairs, wanting to leave as soon as possible.

"You won't stay for the circle?" Hyde called out after him, but Eric was in too big hurry to give him an answer. Tonight's revelation painfully squeezed his stomach and he hardly refrain himself from vomiting. After this he was sure in something he suspected for quite some time now and what he assumed from this morning. He finally understood his mother's warning over breakfast and revealed the mystery behind Jackie's using of his surname again. Hyde whom he knew and loved was gone, probably left behind somewhere in Las Vegas, or maybe in Chicago's motel. But he was sure he won't lose Donna too.

He quickly extended his step, ran out from the house and rushed to the departing figure. Hurriedly stepping in front of Jackie he asked: "When do we start?"


End file.
